Boy or girl?

Yesterday on my plane ride, I thought long and hard about all the advantages of having a baby boy and then I did the same for a baby girl. In the end, it got jumbled up and all of my "theories" blended into all the same ideas. Being a parent is one of life's gifts and while parenting also makes for good stand-up comedy material and there is plenty to not enjoy about it, the truth is that the roller coaster of emotion it sends me on gives new and real meaning to my life.

On one hand, having a little girl would be a dream come true for both me and Beata. I have always wanted the opportunity to have a little girl to shower with love and attention. It would be great to show a daughter what love looks like in a healthy family. Beata is a great mom and I think a daughter would highlight some of her parenting strengths in very obvious ways. Beata's selfless and others oriented personality would bring out the best in a female. I can not think of a better model of love, hard work and devotion for any child to witness. It would be great to see the dynamic that would develop between a daughter and Beata. I  would love the experience of watching a little girl grow into a confident and loving woman.

A little boy and seeing Kavaun as big brother to a little brother would be excellent as well. Teaching another boy how to be a loving and caring man who could one day grow up to be a loving a caring husband is an amazing opportunity. Beata is so great with Kavaun and her ability to adapt to a boy's world has been proven over the last three years and for a second boy I think she would excel desptie the energy drain.

While I was sitting on a chartered plane coming home from the Spartan Cornhusker football game, it hit me that adding another little one to the family is obviously going to change things for me in ways I know I will not get until it happens. There's a lot of talk in my social circles about how life changes so dramatically with the addition of the second child, etc. The reality for me is that I have loved the changes in my life with one child. I am guessing that a second child does not simply double to enjoyment, but I have no doubt that I will be fulfilled and happy. Honestly, being a devoted father and husband is what I feel I do best. I identify with those roles and find my joy in those two parts of my life more than anything else in life. There really is not even a close second for me. I tend to be pretty private about it, but my family life is the source of most of my inspiration. It also helps me seek some balance.

October was tough financially. New Water heater, new furnace, new brakes on the car, expensive weekend at Nebraska. It added up quickly. Add to that the anxiety of starting a new basketball season and the time and energy taken to be the best coach I can be and I feel as though I am powering down this week so I can gear up for the marathon that is November, December, January and February. Beata is rightfully anxious and that makes me anxious. Kavaun is at an age where I know I will miss him more and I expect he will "search" for his fulfillment by challenging his mother often. I am picturing some Kavaun time at the gym during my practices. Uh oh.

May the next 120 days be rewarding and happy,
N

Traditions we love

Yesterday we made another visit to the orchard with Kavaun. By my count, this is his fourth visit to the orchard this fall. I got some good pictures, including the one of him with the pumpkin Rene Wheaton gave him when he was a newborn. We have taken a picture each of the last four Octobers with the little pumpkin because it shows his growth.

I figure since we have told the first tier of people, I can now post on here that BEATA is PREGNANT! I am so excited about this recent development. We are both a little nervous because of the gap of time between doctor visits. WE are at the 10-week point. The due date is in mid-May. I love this! I have never been more fulfilled in my life.

Kavaun will share the spotlight easily no doubt?

In Kavaun news, we have been amused by his increased talking, questions, singing and bedtime antics. Bedtime at 8:30 or so now means asleep around 10 p.m. after several stalling tactics which include, but are not limited to

• Requesting we cut off the tags on his shirt, pants, stuffed animals and "napkins" (napkins = the wash cloths he sleeps with.
• Requesting specific colors for his wash cloth napkins he sleeps with
• A change of PJ's
• To go potty (actually sitting on it even though he is not really all that motivated to go)
• Flip his pillow to the cool side
• Singing in his bed endlessly
• Playing with his animals and having them talk to one another

This boy is the other love of my life and I have already made room for my third love - whoever he or she might be . . .

While Beata is understandably more nervous about the impending adjustments (she is the realist while I operate in the optimist/naive world), we are both THRILLED and I cannot wait until May to meet Kavaun's little brother or sister.

- N

This realization just occurred to me tonight in a crystal clear sort of way: I have never been so in love in my life.
Thank you Kavaun.
Thank you Beata.
I am one very lucky man.
These are such sacred times.

Happy Third Birthday

It is officially your birthday since it is just after midnight.
And Kavaun, for your birthday I will make a few proclamations:

1. You, my boy, are everything that is great in my world
2. You have helped me change into a whole new version of me
3. You are my best buddy

Some things we have been doing a lot of lately:

• Playing Monster. This is where you and I crawl around on the floor grunting, high-fiving and "threatening" to get mama as a team of monsters. 
• You have been singing a ton! Today you imitated your music teacher, Ms. Laura, and you instructed class saying things like, "nice job" and "now we will will sing a new song"
• Still dancing
• Couch jumping!
• Circle running!
• Swinging in our backyard
• Pointing out airplanes all the time. You can spot even the smallest cloud-hidden planes up there and you hear them when I do not even notice them at all.
• Kisses - the rain kiss before bed and multiple kisses when you want to stall from doing something.

Happy Birthday Buddy. Today when you hugged me and said, "I love you baba" I was reminded again that there is nothing quite like this. Nothing.

I love you too... and I also love mama (you keep asking each of us if we love the other and if we love Kavaun)

- Baba

Happy Birthday practice

• Listening to Kavaun and Beata practice singing Happy Birthday for his upcoming third birthday is sweet.
• Kavaun claims he wants to use the potty when he turns three. I cannot wait.

The bee who had a long day

Scene: A dead bee was laying in the window sill.

Kavaun: Baba, that bee is sleeping? (reaching out to touch the crispy critter)
Me: Do not touch bees. They sting sometimes.
Kavaun: Did the bee have a long day?
Me: (laughing with Beata) I am not sure, but I will take him outside to sleep.

Subtle changes

The dining room is now the toy room
Sweet potatoes are a main course and not a side dish
The hose is used as a huge water gun in addition to watering the flowers
Kavaun's words become our words - potty, guitar man, and staw-e-berries
More later

Ordinary Great

Sitting here with Kavaun. He is pressed up against my left side with his eyes carefully fixed on a favorite cartoon,"Word World". Let the record indicate that summer 2011 has been awesome. Awesomely ordinary with trips to the park, sprinkler fights, walks through the neighborhood, reading books, singing songs, laying around, blanket tents on rainy days and car rides searching for turtles and deer.

Most recently, we have had some good Ionia visits with trampoline jumping, more sprinkler fun and fights with Jude. Kavaun enjoys his cousin time and has fun with his aunts in Ionia.

A few more weeks and back to work.

N

First pee in the potty

Let the record show that we just experienced the twenty-five minute first pee in the potty roller-coaster ride! More later. Funny stuff.

Perfect Night

Everything in this world is perfect right now

Beata laughing with Kavaun in his bedroom

Two hours past his bedtime

But that's okay

No, it's better than okay

it's perfect

He keeps giggling and stalling

Mama serenades him

I sit here

smiling

Petting Zoo

A fun picture of my two favorite people

June 2011 at Double J Ranch

Cold side!

As I sit here in a church parking lot off of Grange Hall Road with Kavaun sleeping in the backseat on one of our many nap drives, I am reminded that I am a kick-ass dad. While I kid, I have to admit that yesterday afternoon may have been the most challenging Kavaun day of my life. Nothing crazy or horrible. Just a tired boy without his nap being cranky and demanding. Yesterday’s melt down prompted today’s nap drive. I planned ahead with the U2 lullaby CD playing, my laptop and even a wireless connection in this wooded area (luck). I even have my list of bullet points in my messy script titled, “Baby Blog 5/18”. Here goes the rundown, starting with a recent Father’s Day that was awesome!

Father’s Day 2011 was spent at the Double J Ranch in Rothbury Michigan with Beata, Ryan, Amy, the boys and KK. It was a great time with one on one time with Ryan and Amy included. Indoor waterpark, petting zoo, pony rides for the boys = a great time. Beata’s gift to me was awesome. She made me a very cool collage of Kavaun black and white photo’s and most included him, me and smiles.

Mother’s Day was awesome as well. I made Beata a video set to music with Kavaun photos and video. It was to L-O-V-E by Nat King Cole. Good stuff. She loved it!

Other stuff:

Hide and Seek is a ritual everyday that Beata gets home from work. We are starting to phase out of it a little bit, but on most days Kavaun hides his face and thinks because he cannot see us, we cannot see him. Lots of giggles.

We have a little tradition where we eat one another’s cheeks with loud, “num num num” noises like Cookie Monster. I love it.

Kavaun has a new popular phrase that he must have learned from Beata as she tries to give him words to express himself. He says, “Kavaun sad!” or “I sad” with a perfect pouty face. Most of the time I think he means it and sometimes he says it in jest when he doesn’t get his way.

Reading entire books to us without making up all the words and singing songs are the latest forms of Kavaun entertainment. He loves to sing. His favorites include, I’ve Been Working on the Railroad, Old McDonald, If You’re Happy and you Know It, BINGO, Row Row Row Your Boat and occasionally Take Me Out to the Ballgame.

He also makes up songs. Beata has a goodnight song they sing. I will have to get the tune and lyrics on this blog so they do not get forgotten. They have a very playful and loving bond. Beata plays with Kavaun all the time and he lights up whenever she is around to play, dance, sing or cuddle.

Sometimes Kavaun will mockingly call us by the wrong names to get a laugh. He usually ends up laughing at himself and we often responds by calling him by one of our names or the name of one of his cousins. Fun stuff.

We chase ducks at the Mill Pond.

One day Kavaun said to me with a serious tone, “Swiper no swiping” as he learned it on Dora. He was not joking and I probably should have left his blue car alone rather than “swipe” it from hime. This was not as funny as the time he had a fit when I took his imaginary lemons while in the backseat of the car on Spring Break this year. He had a huge meltdown even though I gave every single one back to him. This little guy gets his mindset on something and he is near-impossible to steer in another direction.

I recently went to Washington DC and while I was gone, Kavaun would tell Beata that I was at President Obama’s house. She must have said that to him when I left and he kept repeating it. Cute.

Kavaun often demands that we turn his pillow over to the “cold side” when we put him to bed – proof to me that some preferences are normal and not learned. He also requests “napkins” and usually two of them by color at night in his crib. He wipes tears and snot with these washcloths.

Music in the Park is awesome. Kavaun dances happily to the live music, tickles the toes of spectators, runs with boys and girls, rolls down the hill.

Chasing ducks

I have a paper list of topics to write about and that will come very soon. In the meantime, these pictures will have to do. This is a wonderful time in our lives with Kavaun. Words and pictures can only tell a small part of the story. I will attempt to download the birthday video I made for Haydeh to celebrate Mother's Day since it includes several photos and video from our Spring Break Florida trip. I also made a video for Beata's birthday that I would like to put on this site as well.

More later,

N

* Pictures are taking too long tonight so maybe next time...

Baba on a string

Well, I just put Kavaun to bed and we had one of those priceless moments. We smiled and stared into each other's eyes. He was stalling because he wanted me to stay in the bedroom and I soaked up a few extra hugs and in between he traced the features on my face with his index finger, his eyes twinkling.

It is crazy falling in love with this boy. He has me on a string.

More later - just wanted to provide that update.

Little Trees

Beata has convinced Kavaun that he is cooking his own food. Last night he made "little trees" (broccoli) and then ate them for dinner. My wife is a genius.

happy birthday to me

today Kavaun peeled his own orange

not his first

exchange of high fives

giggles and proud smiles

congratulations son

big day

many more on the way

do not want this one to slip into the margins though

the best thing that happened on my birthday

Feb 11, 2011

Kavaun has been a ton of fun lately. So, while a lot of these exciting firsts are fresh in my mind I want to get them documented before we move on to all of the new stuff on the way.

• Our son may be a bully? - Kavaun has taken a “tough” approach to dealing with other children (even four and five year olds). It seems that for Kavaun, shoving and even tackling are the best way to intimidate others into giving up a toy or spot in line. He normally goes with a push first, then the swipe of the toy. If the other child hangs on, Kavaun’s persistence and unpredictability seems to be effective in at least forcing the other child to cry a little bit. (My admission here reveals that once or twice I have watched this interaction to see what would happen).
• The Shadow Game – This is bedtime ritual that Kavaun and Beata play. The shadows from their hands and feet talk and dance on the headboard of Kavaun’s bed. Great fun to witness.
• Kavaun is a singing and dancing machine – He has taken it to a whole new level. In his favorite stalling tactic before bed, he will sing a song about 75% of the way through and stop and say, “Uh-oh” before breaking into a whole new song. we, the rookie parents, think it is so cute and he gets an extra 10-15 minutes to avoid bed time. The best is when Kavaun bobs his shoulders back and forth as he sings.
• The Tickle Monster and the Tickle Ferry – Two of Beata’s inventions that get Kavaun giggling in anticipation and then bell laughing as he is tickled and hugged.